Hear. You. Me.
This is my declaration. I cannot stand it here anymore. The toxicity levels are off the charts, and I’m legitmately beginning to lose my mental faculties, albeit much more slowly than before, once again. I’m putting my goddamn foot down this time. I’m getting out of this house as soon as possible, even if it means finding a place in MD for awhile after my upcoming dental surgeries.
The last five years of my life have subsequently been me having to be the one who falls and burns, in my situations, in order to rise from the ashes back out of them. It was my only option each time. Alcoholism.. I got sober, through a very rough (but probably the most productive thing ever) 8 months, and then some. After that, it was getting past my own personal vices and issues for a good year after the mess had subsided from my drinking. Next, it was surgeries, picc lines, home healtchare including hydrotherapy and TPN for the next 2.5 years.. also not limited to one major asshole who pretty much ruined my life. I had to move back home because of said person, the most toxic environment I’ve ever inhabited outside of my own home—the space I shared with them. And I’m back to square one.. getting the fuck out again.
Something is going to give, and goddamnit, it won’t be me this time. NOT AGAIN.